Lots of Love, Molly x (Short Story)

Dear all,

I hope this email finds you well and having a good week. I have to say mine’s been rather memorable. So much so I thought I’d share it with you. Now I realise not everybody reading this knows me personally, but as you’re in the somewhat extensive address books of my dear husband Stephen and best friend Lucy I can only assume you are important to them, and therefore you are important to me.

For those of you who’ve already taken a peek at the attached photograph, I imagine you’re wondering how on earth Stephen and Lucy managed to get themselves into such a position. I know I certainly did. I have to hand it to them, it is quite inventive and there is a level of flexibility that is simply astounding. In all honesty, I’m surprised one of them didn’t put their back out. It’s a good job they’ve had plenty of practice and, as they say, practice makes perfect!

Mind you, perfect is not a word that springs to mind when you look at poor Lucy. I appreciate she hasn’t been photographed from the most forgiving of angles, but I do wish I could have airbrushed some of that orange peel away for her.  She will be mortified when she’s see the state of those thighs. On the other hand, what a great incentive this will be for her to finally start the diet she’s always talking about. Every cloud has a silver lining and all that! Besides, it’s the least I can do given the fact that she seems to be taking such great care of my husband.

Just look at his face, bless him. I know it’s not immediately obvious but, believe it or not, that is a look of pure enjoyment. However, I’d lay money on the fact you’re all thinking it’s a face only a mother could love! Margaret, you’ll have to let me know if that is the case. I guess it must be around forty years since you last saw him frolicking in his birthday suit without a care in the world. I’m sure this photograph will be bringing back many happy memories for you. You’ll have to pop round for a coffee sometime soon so I can show you the rest. There’s quite a collection!

In fact, I’d be happy to extend the offer to anyone reading this, particularly Stephen’s work colleagues. I know he can be a little intimidating at times and over the years he’s alienated many of you, but I do think this could help make him a little more approachable. After all, teaching is a difficult enough profession without the added stress of friction amongst the staff. As you will be aware his best friend at work is Bob, whom you all know as headmaster.  Did I mention Lucy is married to Bob?

Well, must dash now. I’ve thrown caution to the wind and booked myself a ‘Shirley Valentine’ holiday to Greece. Stephen will have to make his own chips and egg tonight.

Lots of love,

Molly x